captives

A public university is a good place to learn . . .

about people.

Today a discussion about moral standards in my Communication in Groups & Teams class (yes, that is a real class) turned into a group therapy session. A significant portion of the discussion was devoted to "what would you do if you found out your significant other was cheating."

I was boggled by the definition of "cheating."

One girl explained the discussions she and her boyfriend had had about "would I forgive you if you were cheating," then wrapped up by saying that she knew he wasn't one she would marry and that sooner or later they'll break up and she'll be really down for about a month and then get over it.

Every once in a while someone in the class would make a comment about marriage. I couldn't figure out what the definition of that was, either. As best as I could figure, marriage is a really special kind of embellishment you add to a relationship that means a lot to you -- for as long as that relationship means a lot to you. After that, get out as fast as you can.

It was sad.

Later I had another experience off campus that emphasized the kind of moral vacuum that exists when the world looks at relationships between men and women.

On one side, this is a deep tragedy -- for the men and women who make the wrong decisions, and for the children who live with the consequences.

On another side, this is an awesome opportunity -- to let our standards in our relationships (which are totally foreign to anything the world is used to) shine the light of Christ.

We can let our love as brothers and sisters shine in our faithfulness and kindness in a world where people look at others as instruments for their own pleasure.

We can let our love as children toward parents shine in our obedience and honor in a world where parents and rejected and derided.

We can let our love as future husbands and wives shine in our purity and sincerity in a world where relationships are built on lust and greed.

We can let our love as husbands and wives shine as a picture of Christ and the church in a world where marriage is "been there, done that."

We can let our love as parents shine as we raise children that are citizens of another -- that is, a heavenly -- country in a world that is self-absorbed.

We can let our love as families shine in our harmony and hospitality in a world characterized by houses full of feasting -- with strife.

Marriage is not an accident of the human condition. It's an amazing, intentional picture of Christ's love. Let's defend it, diligently prepare for it, honor it, and live it.